Everything I Need to Know About Life...

[princessaisly]

Almost anything can be "dirty"

The four food groups consist of: fast food, frozen food, junk food and take out

Oy! With the poodles already!

Always carry a book, you'll never know when you'll need it

God lives in London

Coffee is essential for survival

Swans are vicious birds

The difference between cows and humans is hay

Snow is magical

Childbirth is like doing the splits on a case of dynomite

The fish flies at night

If you walk with a Harry Potter book on your head, and drop the book... Harry will die!

A lap is an illusion

If men can name children after themselves, why not women?

Copper Boom!

Backwards baseball hats and flannel never go out of style

Never buy something just because it's furry

If you're frustrated with someone, try pushing him into a lake

It's better to have a haunted leg then a cold

When stuck in a hopeless situation, climb out the balconey window

You can never have too many Thanksgiving dinners

The answers to problems in the mid-east is: "I have to poop"!

Booze is grown up milk and cookies

Dressing up in a cute little maid costume is the closest any self-respecting girls comes to 'cleaning up'

Answer the Pepperoni

Roomba=vacuum and entertainment in one nifty package

Rocket love is true love

The greatest of bonds is that of mother and daughter!